Living in Alignment: The Key to Authenticity and Fulfillment (ft. Charisse M. Williams)

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Alignment is about living in a way that feels true to who you are and what you want out of life. As a life coach, getting a handle on living in alignment is key—not just for you to live your own best life, but for your ability to guide your clients effectively. 

In this episode of the Everything Life Coaching podcast, Noelle Cordeaux and leadership coach Charisse M. Williams talk about what alignment means for them - and you!
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As a former executive in various organizations, Charisse has launched program sites, raised millions of dollars, and driven transformational change for communities. Her journey to becoming a full-time entrepreneur and coach was inspired by her own experiences with executive coaching.

Charisse is the author of "The Joy of Thriving While Black" and she offers her services through one-on-one coaching, speaking engagements and team-building retreats.

To explore Charisse's work, visit her website at www.charissemwilliams.com, or find her on LinkedIn.

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What is Living in Alignment?

At its core, alignment is about knowing who you are, what you value, and what you want to achieve in life. 

It involves clearly defining your vision, goals, and intentions, and then aligning your resources - time, energy, and money - to support these aspects of yourself. It’s also how you want to show up in the world and the impact you aim to make.

The concept of alignment goes well beyond an abstract idea. It also involves the connection between your mind, body, and spirit. When these elements are working together, rather than against one another, you are operating in a state of true alignment.

Why Does Alignment Matter?

“Coming out of the pandemic, there’s been a reckoning with our values. It's becoming harder and harder for folks, myself included, if our insides do not match our outsides. The outcome of living out of alignment with your values is pain." - Noelle Cordeaux

Living in alignment with your values leads to a sense of fulfillment, authenticity, and purpose. 

When your actions and choices reflect your true self, you're more likely to feel satisfied and content with your life. Conversely, when you're out of alignment, you may experience feelings of discomfort, frustration, or even pain. That pain that comes with living out of alignment with one's true values can be a powerful motivator for change!

More Resources:
What Are Your Core Values and Why Do They Matter?
Align with Your Calling: How to Find Freedom in Life Coaching

What Might it Look Like to Live with Integrity?

Martha Beck's book "The Way of Integrity" poses a thought-provoking question: What would life look like if we never told a lie to ourselves or other people? 

Many of us tell small lies every day, not necessarily about big things, but in situations where we're not being completely truthful.

While being completely truthful can sometimes be uncomfortable or even painful, it leads to better alignment with one's true self and values. 

Consider: is integrity just about big moral decisions, or is it also about the small, everyday choices we make?

Discovering Values

For many clients, the journey towards alignment begins with identifying their core values. As a coach, you can guide them through this process by encouraging them to envision their ideal future. By discussing what they want their relationships, career, or overall life to look like, values often emerge in a more organic way.

Another effective approach is to ask clients to pay attention to energy levels. Activities or situations that energize a person often align with their values, while those that drain energy may not be in alignment. 

Overcoming Barriers to Alignment

Many people struggle with keeping promises to themselves, leading to feelings of disappointment and frustration, guilt and shame.

Societal messages that tie worth to productivity can make it challenging to prioritize rest and self-care. Additionally, cultural and familial expectations can create significant pressure to live in ways that may not align with one's true self. This is particularly true for individuals from marginalized communities or immigrant backgrounds, who may feel compelled to work harder and sacrifice more to prove their worth.

5 Strategies for Getting into Alignment 

Practice Self-Compassion: Recognize that undoing years of conditioning takes time. Be patient with yourself as you work towards alignment.

"I say this to my clients, that undoing ways of thinking and ways of being takes a lot of time and a lot of practice, just like getting into that state took." - Charisse M. Williams

Seek Support from Others: Surround yourself with people who share your vision for wellbeing. Having a supportive community can provide encouragement and accountability. When making changes, communicate your intentions to those around you. This can help ease transitions and reduce friction in relationships.

"One of the most important things to shine a light on in our time is to encourage ourselves and each other to connect, reconnect, keep those connections alive so that we can stay whole." - Noelle Cordeaux

Learn to Say No: Practice telling the truth, even in small ways, to build the courage for setting bigger boundaries. Recognize that saying "yes" when you mean "no" is a form of dishonesty to yourself and others.

Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to physical sensations as a guide to your alignment. Your body often provides valuable information about your state of alignment.

Regularly Reassess: As you grow and evolve, your sense of alignment may shift. It's important to regularly check in with yourself and adjust your path as needed.

What Alignment Looks Like in Different Areas of Life

It might be hard to imagine what “living in alignment” looks like in real life. Keep in mind that what works for you might not work for others, and vice versa. Here are some practical examples to guide you as you begin to explore:

Work and Career: Alignment in your professional life means choosing a career path that resonates with your values and allows you to utilize your strengths. It involves finding a balance between challenging yourself and feeling fulfilled by your work.

Relationships: In relationships, alignment means surrounding yourself with people who support your growth and share your values. It also involves being authentic in your interactions and setting healthy boundaries.

Personal Growth: Continually learning and evolving in ways that feel true to your core self. Pursuing growth opportunities that excite and inspire you, rather than those you feel obligated to follow, or following outdates blueprints for yourself.

Health and Wellness: Listening to your body and honoring its needs. This might look like adopting a diet and exercise routine that feels energizing and sustainable for you.

Spirituality: For those who value spirituality, alignment might mean engaging in practices that connect you to something greater than yourself, whether that's through organized religion, meditation, nature, or other means.

Alignment is an ongoing process, with small shifts towards our own personal true north. As we grow, evolve, and experience more of the world, our sense of alignment may shift. What once felt right may no longer serve us, and new paths may open up that better reflect who we are now.

"One of the beautiful things about being a coach is that serving my clients and being a companion with them on their journeys is always helping me too, because we're all human with the same challenges." – Charisse M. Williams

As a life coach, you can live in more alignment and model this important practice for your clients by frequently checking in with yourself, reassessing your values and goals, and making adjustments as needed. 

Want to Become An Authentic, Aligned Coach?

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